Have you made or are you thinking of NY resolutions, goal-setting or an intention for 2019?
However you describe this inclination to do, be or have something different from what you are currently experiencing, I’d like to encourage you to first of all observe where you are ‘coming from’?
What do I mean?
When I say ‘where are you coming from?’ I mean what is the state of mind or state of being that is fueling your goal, resolution or intention? Is it fear? Then don’t plan anything just yet, wait for a time when you feel neutral/grounded. In that place you are present to your life and you’ll effortlessly know which area of life to put some attention on. You also want to feel good about your intention as that naturally unlocks inner resources to power your implementation of it, including the ‘how’ or at least the next immediate ‘how’ step.
When we act from fear or resentment we tend not to achieve what we want as those states are not very empowering plus they are guzzlers of creative energy, the very thing we need to keep moving. Or if we do achieve something it doesn’t feel how we thought it would and we may have sacrificed other good things on the way like our health, integrity or gut instinct.
What about anger?
Anger can be a great clarifying emotion if you are willing to see what you need to see, allow the anger to abate and then reassess.
What about feeling excited?
It’s great to feel excited about something, but can you feel behind the excitement into a more neutral place? Are you still keen to go ahead. Sometimes a surface surge of positive emotion is masking fear or a desperation/impatience for change. Feeling good about your intention comes from a much deeper place and it’s there even if you meet obstacles or setbacks along the way.S
Consider these before you begin
(Feel free to ignore these if not helpful. They may also spark other ideas)
- Feel uncomfortable feelings until you feel settled or clear. It’s a process and may take a while but it will always be taking you in the direction you want to go. Holding onto that assurance is a huge help.
- Give yourself permission to not set any goals or intentions for now. You’ll know when it’s time.
- Sit in silence for a bit if that feels nurturing.
- Is there some practical task you are ready to do, like cleaning? Then immerse yourself in that for a while.
- Get some fresh air if that feels good, even if it’s just opening a window.
Let it be joyful
Have fun imagining your intention unfolding. You are not trying to make anything happen. It’s a useful exercise in that it may throw up some helpful insights, and it may also throw up some uncomfortable feelings to be felt. I know, I’m all about feeling those feelings especially the uncomfortable ones. Although not really recognised as such, doing this is also part of your ‘how’, i.e. the implementation phase, it also shortens the journey!
What I’ve personally found is I will have an idea to do something and it’s not at all obvious it’s connected with any intention I’ve set and then later on I join the dots and I see what happened, and it’s usually all very effortless as long as I keep ‘feeling’. In fact the most discomfort is from feeling through emotion rather than any external action I’ve needed to take.